Sexual Problems

How can Marriage Counseling help reduce Sexual Problems?

How partners feel about their sex life in a relationship has a big impact on each partner’s overall satisfaction in their relationship. When one, or both partners, are unhappy with their sex life, they are generally unhappy in therelationship.


Sexual Problems
Couples who experience problems with their sex life often report

  • Being unhappy with how often they have sex
  • Being unhappy with what activities they engage in during sex
  • Being unhappy with how much emotional connection they have during sex
  • Being unhappy with their partner’s sex drive

Every relationship has its sex life ups and downs. It’s healthy for your relationship if you are flexible and understanding when life stress of work, children, or even illness occurs. However, long-lasting, ongoing sexual problems can have a bigger impact on your relationship than you may think.


Sexual problems can have lasting impacts on a relationship and often unconsciously spill over into other areas of your relationship. You or your partner may feel angry or resentful. You may have difficulty communicating your sexual needs to your partner.


A lack of physical connection between partners can also lead to a lack of emotional connection so that you gradually feel like you are losing your emotional bond with the person you love. If your sexual problems are not resolved, then the impact of these and other related problems can lead to divorce or infidelity if a partner thinks that their sexual needs won’t ever be met.


Factors that may contribute to Sexual Problems:

  • Medications
  • Hormone imbalances
  • High blood sugar
  • Prostate or gynecological problems
  • Being out of shape
  • Spending too much time at work
  • Stress
  • Substance abuse
  • Having different work or sleep schedules
  • Being too busy to have alone time together

Sexual problems can also come from a couple’s differing opinions about a healthy sex life:

  • Partners may not enjoy engaging in the same sexual activities as the other
  • Partners may be dissatisfied with foreplay
  • Partners may be dissatisfied in the emotional connection of lovemaking
  • Sex may become routine or uninteresting (“we always start with this, then we do this, then it’s over”)
  • Partners may have different levels of sex drive
  • Partners may have different opinions on how often to have sex

Personal factors may also contribute to a couple’s sexual problems:

  • Partners may have performance anxiety
  • Partners may have negative beliefs about sex
  • Partners may have a past negative experience with sex, making it difficult to enjoy sex

How Marriage Counseling and Couples Counseling can help resolve sexual problems

  • Many couples are embarrassed or afraid to seek marriage counseling due to their sexual problems.
  • Couples think that their sexual problems will resolve themselves. (They won’t.)
  • Couples feel embarrassed or that other people don’t have sexual problems in their relationship. (Don’t be embarrassed. Lots of people have the same problems you’re having.)
  • Couples underestimate how a healthy sex life can impact your relationship. (A good sex life is VITAL to a healthy marriage.)
  • Couples feel hopeless that their sexual problems can be solved. (Your sexual problems are fixable. Couples Counselors at Heartland Counseling Center are trained in helping you overcome these problems and know how to teach you and your partner to openly communicate your sexual needs to each other.)

Marriage counseling and couples counseling can help partners learn to better communicate their sexual needs and can help couples resolve deeper conflicts that may be inhibiting a good sex life. Through marriage counseling or individual counseling we can also address anxieties, negative beliefs, upsetting past sexual experiences, or any other factors that are contributing to your sexual problems. Contact us today. Learn how a healthy sex life could be the missing component in your relationship. 

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